Obliteration
by TH3angelinH3LL
Summary: It has been years since the Croatoan virus was unleashed on the human race, leaving few safe havens behind and the population devastated. Castiel resides at Camp Chitaqua with Dean, Chuck and a handful of survivors. This story is based off of S5x04 The End, may contain spoilers and revolves around hippie!cas. Rated M. Destiel if you squint, possibly heavier later. Cas/OC
1. Claire?

**AN:** Yeah so I know I should be updating Bad Wings -smacks fingers-, but this just had to be put up here. Please let me know what you think with a review or even what you would like to see happen in the future! Bad Wings will be updated, I promise!

From start to finish it was just another day at Camp Chitaqua. He'd made the few sales that were lined up for the day and now he found himself making his way to the canteen for dinner. As he ducked inside he could almost hear Chuck's aggravated voice from the supply room, fretting about their dwindling supply.

One of the safe havens nearby gave out an S.O.S a few days ago, causing them to take on more people than they were capable of handling. Cas had gone on the first retrieval mission, helping to clear the neighboring camp of the visibly infected before stalling just long enough with his comrades to find out the last of them. Without a thought, or show of emotion, they dispatched the unclean as easy as one might change their socks. The whimpers from the afflicted's nearby family members were not lost on him however and would likely stay with him for some time.

Cas helped survivors, mostly injured into the bed of his truck before securing the tailgate and readying to make way back to base camp. The drive seemed to drag on, the short miles between the camps stretching into an endless expanse. Reaching to the cup holders he fumbled a bit before managing to procure a Vivance and sent it down the hatch sans water. Tightening his grip on the steering wheel he had continued on, following the small trail of tail lights in front of him.

The following night he'd opted out for the scavenging hunt, stowing away in his cabin to try and forget the faces he'd blown away twenty four hours ago. He knew, deep down, that what he had done was the right thing; it was for the protection of his fellow Humans, how could it be wrong? Although he was loathe to admit it he carried a great deal of grief for the things he had done in his time at Camp Chitaqua. Sure the people -monsters he killed were a threat but they still had family and friends that would be grieving.

As he shambled up to the dinner line he grabbed a plate and silver ware, drumming a mismatched beat into the ceramic with his pointers. Dipping into the first serving tray he paid no attention to the food or the slop sound it made as it hit his plate. He was lost in memories, Jimmy's memories to be exact. For him to have so much blind faith to just throw himself away was something Cas respected. Jimmy had left behind a family several times at Castiel's beckoning call and it was something he felt slightly guilty for now. Now that he understood what the crushing weight within his chest was he wished he could take it back. He knew without a doubt he could never take it back, never change the events that unfolded them into this existence, but a boy could dream, no?

If he had to he wouldn't have been able to recall what he'd put on his plate, it was an identifiable substance, one he'd certainly been greeted with before, but he was too lost in thought. Flashes of light and color that formed into memories of a life he never lived. Cas sat alone tonight, his ladies did their best to beckon him to a nearby table, but he declined politely with a shake of the head and a warm smile, preferring to keep to himself for the night.

Shoveling food haphazardly into his mouth he looked around at the different people in the room. He couldn't recall most of the faces, a few old familiar faces stuck out from the crowd as they talked and laughed amongst themselves, doing their best to keep spirits up as always. That was one thing Cas had always admired about the Human race, their ability to adjust and survive.

Tearing a scrap off of partially stale bread he pushed it around in his dish before nibbling at the ends. Staring down into his dish he sighed, things here were good yes, but what he wouldn't give for a little variation. Pushing himself up to stand he brushed his leftovers into the slop bucket beside the dish return and made his way back to his cabin.

"Cas?"

The voice nearly scared him out of his boots, but the nervous tremor is what really disturbed him. Turning in the darkness he was able to make out the other person occupying his porch and offered a concerned smile,"Jane, what's wrong?"

He noticed the nervousness in her posture, the way she laced and unlaced her fingers to try and stem it, "Can we talk inside?"

"Sure." Pushing the door open he held the beaded curtain aside, motioning for her to enter, and followed in after her. He left the door open for ventilation; it was nice out, a slight chill to the breeze which made for perfect sleeping weather. But if the worried inclination in her tone said anything, it was definitely that he would not be seeing his mattress any time soon. Moving to light the propane torch he fumbled for a moment before the room was bathed in a fluorescent like glow. He waited a beat more, watching her pace in a short circle, before prompting her. "What did you want to talk about?"

She paced for a moment more, as if trying to think of the proper words, "I'm not sure how to say this, but, something's happened." She paused for a beat, "I can't explain, just get what you need and come with me."

"Jane," A nervous ball was building in his abdomen, "I am not going anywhere until you tell me what's got you so worked up."

Jane fixed him with a deadly serious look, crossing her arms over her chest as the start and finish of her argument.

Noting the heavy gaze he nodded, "Fine, are we leaving Camp?" At her nod of acquiescence he moved to grab his pistol, his ammunition and Beretta in the truck from the other day. Tucking the gun into the back of his jeans he grabbed his backpack, turning the lantern off and followed Jane out the door. Closing up behind him he got into the truck, back pack on the middle spot between them, and started it up. "Where are we going?" He turned to her in the darkness of the truck, recalling the moments leading up to this leap of trust on his part. Jane, being one of their resident medics had saved his hide more times than he could count by now and found it odd that this was the way he realized that she was a good friend.

"I was scavenging yesterday-" She seemed to cut herself off, as if she was afraid to say too much. "Just head to the camp we responded to on Monday. You remember?"

His abhorrent drug use was definitely no secret, but she was taking it a bit far. How could he forget blowing several infected's heads off, intoxicated or not? In the darkness of the truck he gave her an 'are you serious' look, stopping and waiting for the front gate to be opened for them. "Of course I remember. Do you often forget obliterating another Human being?" He knew the comment was a tad harsh and uncalled for, but this was a trip into a hot zone, in the middle of the night when he could be sleeping.

The rest of the drive was spent silent, Jane inspected their guns, making sure they were clean and loaded a few moments before they pulled into the dusty drive way.

"Pull to the last building on the left over there."

It was a small ramshackle of a shack and it didn't look like it would house much of anything causing him to raise a brow. Parking so the headlights illuminated the building in question in front of them Cas noted a length of thick cow chain coming from a hole in the wall, secured by a number of iron tent steaks and finally wrapped around a concrete block and secured with a handful of heavy duty master locks. The image had him figuratively scratching his head and clutching the shotgun to his side he got out, leaving the engine running incase they needed to duck and run. "It looks as if they were keeping something in here. Something incredibly strong."

Jane said nothing, merely nodded, motioning for Cas to fall in behind her.

Glancing over his shoulder a few times and around the perimeter her decided they were safe for the moment, lowering his gun as they stood at the door.

"I'll go in first." She gave him a look that said 'I'm sorry', failing to elaborate on why as she disappeared into the darkness.

Switching his flashlight on to see the bits of the room that weren't bathed in light by the headlights he scanned their surroundings slowly, finding the chain he had seen outside and trying to find an end to it.

"Don't worry."

"About?" He raised a brow, slowing the speed of the light as the chain came to an end several feet away. It was secured to a- No.

"She can't reach you from there."

It couldn't be. He had been mildly surprised before, but shocked like this, never. He had held out little hope all this time, but to be confronted with the reality, rather than the dream of a peaceful death. "Claire?" His voice, normally rugged and strong betrayed him. It was small and wavering, choking on the one syllable name as a surge of emotion rushed forward. The figure turned, exposing its face fully. And what was missing of it. He knew deep down that this wasn't his daughter. She was the product of the union between Jimmy Novak and his wife Amelia. But something inside of him screamed out that she was in fact his own.

The thing that used to be beautiful and full of life smiled at him, which was a feat in itself as a quarter of its jaw was missing."Daddy." It was mangled, gurgling and deep. It sounded nothing like Claire Novak. But it was. Of course the only full blown Croat he'd come across that was aware enough to speak had to be her. Just when he had begun to feel normal, like maybe the self medication wasn't actually helping, his whole world collapsed in on itself.

Falling to his knees with a strangled gasp he let out a soft declaration for what he knew he had to do. "No, not my daughter." He heard a slight whimper from Jane, understanding why she was too distraught to tell him face to face. He wouldn't have believed her without seeing first hand anyway. Discarding the shotgun he leaned forward severely, his forehead almost coming to rest on his bent knees. Reaching his hands to cradle his face for a moment he rocked back and forth, wiping the salty tears away. Running his fingers through the dirt beneath him he took a stabilizing breath, tilting to look towards the Heavens although they were obstructed by the roof. "Have I not given you everything you have asked of me from day one? Blind obedience? Endless love?"Letting his chin swoop to his chest he let out a shaky breath, "And for what? _**THIS**_?" The last word was yelled, causing his lips to form into an indignant, hateful line.

Claire, or what used to be Claire, took his shout as a threat and ran full speed towards him, only to be yanked back centimeters from him. Fighting against the thick chain her shoes slipped across the dirt floor, snarling into her former Father's face.

Pushing himself to his feet he took a moment to imagine her whole and unafflicted. She would've been going into Junior High this year, attending some of her first school dances. Checking the rounds in the shotgun he pumped it, loading the rounds into the chamber. Shakily he brought it up, staring down the double barrel. Feeling his body tremble he wavered, fighting the urge to curl into the fetal position and let a few tears slip past. Bringing the barrel back up he held back his sorrow, hoping his tears would cloud his view. He had been hoping, holding out for a happy ending. Now all he was left with was obliteration, "I love you Claire," Cas sputtered the words out, wrenching his eyes shut through a torrent of sobs. "But you are not my little girl anymore." Taking one last look at what he could have once considered his daughter he closed his eyes and pulled the trigger.

There were few things in life that could compare to the sound of your daughter's head exploding, the contents spraying out in one violent goodbye. Wrenching his eyes open he took in the sight before him, he needed to see it, make sure it was real and not just a bad trip. With a great sob the Beretta clamored to the ground, his shoulders buckling under the weight of his grief. It was no secret that life after the apocalypse was rough but nothing had brought him to his knees before.

Jane spoke over the few muffled sobs that echoed across the small room, "Cas. I-"

"Don't." He knew what was coming, an apology for an act she did not commit. Part of him wished she had never brought him here but a bigger part of him respected her for not taking the easy way out. "You didn't do anything wrong." Swiping a hand across his face he grasped his gun, leaning on it slightly as he rose from the dirt floor. He could still feel the pools of damnation stinging the backs of his eyes, "She wasn't really my daughter anyways."

She opened her mouth to say something, perhaps contradictory but she stopped herself and nodded. "Lets go back to base, I'll drive."

With a sniff he turned his back on the corpse of Claire Novak, shuffling out of the shed behind Jane. Swinging himself up and into the passenger seat he laid the shotgun on the floor, "Thank you Jane."

How did one go about accepting thanks for delivering the terrible news that your sort of maybe daughter was a zombie? Pulling out of the gates of the devastated camp she focused on the road, nodding in acceptance.

Stumbling into the cabin he snickered, "I am sooo glad we stopped at Thompsons cabin first."

Jane raised a brow, leaning in the doorway as Cas fumbled about to light some candles. "I think you went a little heavy on the hooch, Cas."

Lighting a few candles he blew the match out at his fingertips, "Maybe you just didn't go heavy enough." He felt as if he were on the verge of slurring his words together, that lovely state of limbo in between being fucked up beyond repair and jovially smashed. He definitely liked it here, but given the days events he was on the search of something with a bit more of a brain numbing effect.

Stepping fully into the room she left the door open, allowing the breeze to filter through. "Maybe, Cas, maybe."

Taking a seat on the bed he reached under, sliding out a worn Tupperware container. Opening it he pulled out a rather full looking sandwich baggie with a devious smirk. "Come, join me in a little exploration of the mind."

Folding her arms across her chest she rolled her eyes, "I know what goes on in that bed."

Pulling a pack of rolling papers from the container he set about rolling a joint, carefully picking out stems and seeds as he went along. "Please, the orgies take place on the first Thursday of every month on the floor. There's just not enough room for all of my students on this mattress. Now, Dean's mattress however, I envy." Licking a thin line of saliva down the glue strip he sealed the twist up, "We should switch, I mean sure he's just a promiscuous as I am but not with multiple partners at one time. The man wouldn't know the meaning of a Menage-A-Quinze if it slapped him in the face."

Eyeing the spot on the floor in question she stepped over it, "You call them students, I call them groupies. Or sluts." Sitting on the small mattress beside him she couldn't help but laugh, it felt cramped with just the two of them sitting she couldn't imagine what it would be like with double digits. "Cas, being the bigger man whore isn't something to really be proud of in my book."

Leaning in to the candle burning on the side table he lit the joint, taking small hits in rapid succession to hold in for as long as he could. Snorting slightly from the heavy smoke in his lungs and nostrils he passed it to Jane, exhaling in slow bursts as he spoke. "For my first billion or so years I was a virgin, I'm making up for lost time here. And," Raising a hand to his mouth he coughed slightly, "they aren't sluts. Yeah I preach to them about some bullshit cosmic connection we all share as human beings and how we should experience that communication through my phallus, but in all actuality it's just good business."

Taking the joint from him she inhaled a few times, noting the perfection to it, the kind of perfection that took years of practice. How long had Cas been here? It had come up in discussion not long after she had found herself bloodied and screaming in the bed of his truck, but time passed and the memory faded. "Good business?" She choked out, "How exactly do you figure that."

"Jane," He took the joint back, hitting it between words, "you don't think the small crop I keep in the closet is just for me, do you?"

"I see." Smirking she turned beet read for a moment before speaking. "So it takes a drug sale to get into your pants?"

He couldn't help the bark of laughter at that, "Oh, trust me, they've gone down for much less."

Idly she wondered why he hadn't elaborated on his feelings about Claire, but here they were talking about how easy of a fuck he was. She certainly didn't mind the topic, Cas was good looking, in fact she'd always found him attractive. "I believe it." Taking the joint she took a few good hits, it was nearing the 'ow, fuck, my fingers' stage.

"Tell me Jane, why did we never work out?"

Swallowing a nervous lump she handed the roach sized smoke to him, wringing her hands together for a moment. "Well, when I first came here I was still very much in love with my husband and you, well, you know why."

Pinching the cherry out he placed the roach on the table, fixing her with a serious look. "No, I don't." Reaching into his top pocket he removed a cigarette he had rolled earlier in the day and lit it. "Last I remember I had asked you to decide between Dean and I. Then," He shook his head, "it's all shit."

"You gave me an ultimatum, Cas. I didn't choose you, but I didn't choose Dean either, so can you stop it with the guilt trip?" She regretted it as soon as she said it, but there was nothing she could do about it now. "Can we just go back to being friends?"

With a heavy sigh he shook his head in the negative, "I can't do that."

"Please?" It was almost a whisper, held together by crackling emotion.

"No." Closing the distance between them he tangled hands in her hair, pressing their foreheads together. "I cannot play this game anymore. I may not be an expert on romance or feelings, but this has to stop Jane, please."

The feel of his hands in her hair was almost too much to bear, the brilliant blue of his eyes threatening to swallow her whole. Her heart hammered in her chest, begging for Cas to continue in his plight.

Slowly he brought his lips in to hers, his eyes sliding closed as they made desperate, heated contact. Giving a gentle tug on the tendrils he managed to align their mouths more properly before pulling away to collect his breath.

She could have cried at the moment he pulled his lips from her, the loss of them was staggering and her eyes shot open to observe the smirk forming on his face. "Cas-"

"No." Closing the distance between them again he edged her slowly back to lying on the bed.

Instinctively she brought her legs up and around him, hands desperately gripping the back of his neck.

Slowly he grinded his hips into hers, lips traveling down the expanse of her neck. Pausing at the dip in her shoulder he bit down slightly, enjoying the way she squirmed underneath him. "Jane," He whispered across her collar bone.

Arching her back into him she bit her lip, muffling a moan at the sound of her own name ghosting across her flesh. Never in a million years would she expect a former Angel to be so sensual. Opening her eyes she observed him pushing the edges of her shirt up, his nose tickling up the inches of newly revealed skin.

If it was one thing he loved about the apocalypse it was the lack of bras, a whole nation –what was left-bouncing around free for the past few years as supplies were more than scarce.

"Stop, Cas. Please."

Of all the times they had fooled around in the past this one seemed the most frustrating. Maybe it was due to the nights emotionally taxing events, or the slow build up of desire for the past two years since Jane had come to Camp Chitaqua. With a grunt he relented, sidling up beside her. "Jane-"

"Just don't. We've had this discussion before, I'm not ready for this Cas and I need you to respect that."

"Not ready for what, exactly? You obviously desire the attentions of a man, I don't see what the problem is."

"That is exactly what the problem is. You think that relationships are just a jumble of limbs, but they aren't." Pushing herself from the bed she adjusted her clothes, "It takes time to romance a woman that's worthwhile."

"Jane, please, spare me the instruction manual and for once take the time to show me. So, I don't know how to treat you? Big surprise! You have to understand the first time I was able to feel emotion I was thrown into the God Damn Demon-Zombie Apocalypse, so excuse me if my emotions are stunted." Flopping over he stretched out on his back, "You have no idea what it's like to live for thousands of years and feel nothing."

"And you have no idea what it's like to be in love with the man that killed your husband."

"Jane!" He tried to call after her but her foot falls were quick and the door to the cabin was slamming shut before he could even think to get himself out of bed. Slamming his head back onto the pillow he grinded his teeth, today certainly was not his day. Idly he wondered if it was a Thursday because nothing beat a full dose of irony right after being theoretically slapped in the groin.


	2. Sales And Bathtubs

_**AN:**_ Sorry this took so long, computer issues etc, but here it is in time for the holiday! Thank you for the review and the follows/favorites! It really helps to know someone is enjoying this crap. Anyways, not sure if I should continue after this chapter or if I have reached the famed logical closure point? Drop me a line and let me know what you think! Also, rating bumped to M because reasons . . Enjoy!

It had been a week since he had last seen the backside of Jane fleeing his cabin and he found it odd, the sensation of missing someone. How could he miss someone that lived in the immediate vicinity of him? Sighing he ran his hands through his hair, eyes falling to naked flesh stretched across his bed beside him. Slowly he ran a hand up his companion's thigh, curling his fingers at her hip. Cas couldn't help but smirk at the way she stretched, sated with a stretching moan. "Morning."

"Morning." Came the blushing feminine reply.

"I hate to wake you," He fumbled for a name momentarily, "Phoebe but I've got some sales lined up for today."

She frowned slightly, turning to her other side to face him and opened her mouth to reply only to be cut off by a sharp knock on the front door.

Cas gave her a sideways I told you so kind of smile, flopping across the vacant space she left behind as she stood and did his best to leave a hand print on her rear. At Phoebe's slightly startled yelp he chuckled, pushing himself from the bed as well.

"I um," She cut herself off by pulling a shirt over her head, "I had a really good time last night."

He watched as she pulled her skirt on, grabbing his sweat pants from the previous day and put them on. "Me too." Bending he slid a large tupperware from under the bed, prying the lid off and grasped a pre tied baggie.

Phoebe grabbed her bag from beside the door, eyes lighting up at the product Cas held out for her.

As her hand reached his own to grab the baggie he held tight to it for a moment, "Always a pleasure doing business with you." He noted her slight blush, releasing the baggie and moved to answer the door. The figure on the other side was a bit of a shock for him, considering his current attire and predicament. "Jane."

"Cas, look, I came over to apologize-" She cut herself short, spotting the redhead over his shoulder and rolled his eyes, "I see you're conducting business at an early hour."

Cas moved aside, allowing Phoebe passage out of the cabin. "What can I do for you?" He stepped back into the cabin, moving to grab his discarded shirt from the floor.

Jane took a few steps inside, nose wrinkling at the smell of stale sex. "I just wanted to say sorry for the other night." She crossed her arms over her chest, somehow with his early morning activity the apology seemed pointless.

Cas nodded in acceptance, moving to his grow closet and tried to make himself look busy and uninterested. The silence hung between them like a third party in their non existent conversation. After a few moments he stopped misting the plants, setting the misting bottle down with an audible thunk. "You'll be pleased to know I have stopped holding orgies, as my man whorish tendencies have been offending some of the campers."

Jane sighed exasperatedly, sure she hadn't exactly been forthcoming to him in the past two years, but what had started out as a lesson in modesty spiraled into unnecessary aggravation. "Look, I know things between us have been weird the past two years but, Cas, you have to understand all I can offer you right now is friendship." If that were completely true, why the stab of jealousy at the sight of one of his groupies?

"I'd rather have you as a friend than not at all, Jane." Cas closed the closet up, "And I guess I am sorry too, for my behavior the other night."

That was the closest to an apology she had heard him give in the past years and with a smile she accepted it, "Friends?" She held out her hand for a shake.

"Friends." He took her hand in his, giving it a firm shake denying the feeling of electricity shooting up his arm.

–

The fall leaves fluttered in a miniature tornado, the crisp fall breeze tossing the colors around like a Monet. Pulling the cigarette from his lips he pinched the cherry out, flicking the butt behind him into the woods and focused on the fishing lines in front of him. He wasn't sure if it was the hooch from earlier, but the line beside him may have just gotten a bite. "Jane," His head flopped lazily over to the woman relaxing with a book at the base of a tree beside him. When she paused reading and looked up at him he nodded in the direction of her rod.

"Oh my God!" She pushed a ripped piece of envelope into the pages as her bookmark before tossing the book down excitedly onto the blanket underneath her. Pushing herself up she moved to grasp the rod, "What do I do?"

Cas chuckled, how any survivor of the Apocalypse managed to get by for years without learning how to fish was beyond him. "Pull up on the rod slightly when you feel a nibble so you can hook the fish securely."

Jane stilled herself, feeling for the slightest movement coming from the other end of the line and as she felt it she jerked on the rod, feeling the resistance on the other side. "I think this may be the biggest fish ever!"

Shaking his head he pushed himself from the sorry excuse for a lawn chair he had been sitting in, "What makes you say that?" His shoes sounded on the rickety dock, less than a foot away from her.

"Because," She leaned back against the tension in the pole, "I can barely hold this th-" She was cut short by a tug on the other end that was hard enough to cause her boots to skid across the wood. She opened her mouth to say something but ended up letting out a strangled yell as she was pulled off the side of the dock and into the pond.

"Jane?" Cas moved quickly to the end of the dock where her sir bubbles were surfacing, he knew she could swim and waited for her to surface. "Jane." His voice was worried, "JANE!" She should've let go of the pole by now and he should've been pulling her onto the dock. But all he was left with was three last bubbles of air. "Shit." With no time left to think he dove over the edge of the dock, doing his best to see in the murky water.

Spotting nothing he surfaced to get a lungful of air before propelling himself to the bottom again. Decayed leaves floated by as he squinted into the frayed patches of watery light, his hands and feet propelling him further from the dock. He headed topside again for more air, kicking against his own buoyancy for the bottom again and spotted a flash of skin. Paddling quickly he came upon Jane, her eyes were closed no air bubbles coming from her lips. Pressing his lips to her own he pushed what remaining air he had left into her lungs before a hand curled around his ankle, pulling him further down and away from her now rising body.

Cas looked down into the face of a Croat, dragging him into the abyss and he kicked wildly, his lungs begging for air. Managing to strike the infected one time in the forehead it released him and he lunged upwards, hooking an arm under Jane's shoulder before breaking the surface. He gasped for air, his body was beginning to get tired but he kicked as hard as he could for land, begging for his feet to be able to touch the muddy bottom.

"Jane." He sputtered, his boots touching the watery floor, arms pushing her in front of him for the shoreline. "Fuck!" He felt a tug on his jeans, his head sinking below for a moment before breaking free again. Hooking both arms under Jane's shoulders he ran for the shore and his shotgun. He pulled her past the cattails, glancing over his shoulder at the surfacing Croat. Moving as quick as he could he made it to the shotgun beside his chair and he pumped two fresh rounds into the chamber. Pulling the forestock back he advanced on the infected, stopping just in front of Jane. Cas gave the shambling hybrid a few moments before pulling the trigger and releasing the bullets into it's brain.

When the Croat fell he dropped the gun, moving to Jane's side. "Jane?!" He was out of breath, "Can you hear me?" He pressed his ear to her chest checking for a heartbeat before beginning CPR. Pinching her nostrils shut he angled her head back slightly, pushing fresh air into her lungs. He waited a beat before doing a round of chest compressions a relieved sigh escaping his lips as she wretched up pond water violently into the grass. "Jesus fucking Christ." He said it between shaky breaths, helping her to her side to clear her airway.

"Cas," She coughed, "what the fuck was that?!"

Catching his breath he chuckled in relief, "I had no idea," He pushed himself to stand, hooking one of her arms around his shoulders, "that Croats had become amphibious."

–

Even though they had rode with the windows up in the truck and the heat blasting all the way back to Camp they were both frigid, the Autumn air cutting straight through to the bone it seemed. Pushing his cabin door open he shut it behind them, his teeth chattering loudly in tune with her own and headed for the bathroom. What little electricity had been doled out to the Camp through what was left of the Federal Government was enough, thankfully, to power water pumps and heaters along with ovens and other necessary items for survival.

Moving to the bathtub he cut the hot water on full blast, adding a mild amount of cold water to the spray to keep from scorching delicate flesh. "First bath is yours," He said through clenching chattering teeth, "don't use all the towels." He turned to find her in the doorway, arms wrapped around her medium frame and teeth chattering just as loudly as his own.

Attempting to visibly shake to cold from her frozen limbs she approached him cautiously, debating the course of action. Biting her lower lip slightly she reached out for the bottom of his shirt and began peeling it up towards his head, rivulets of water speeding down her arm to drip from her elbow.

"Jane?" His head tilted slightly, confusion evident in his voice.

"No, Cas." Relieving him of his soaked shirt she peered up at him, clothing landing with a slop on the linoleum flooring. "No more talking."

Cas tugged on the hem of her shirt, taking it off with minimal assistance and bent, placing shivering kisses along her shoulder. Goosebumps rose across his flesh but he was mildly certain they weren't from the cold, his fingertips dipping below the waist band of her jeans as she kicked off her hiking boots.

Jane allowed her vision to trail the man before her, he was an exquisite being, certainly a top of the line choice for an Angel's vessel and found herself wondering if the man Castiel possessed was somewhere on the inside peering out at her. When it came to sex Jane was a simple woman, not into all that Kama Sutra crap Cas was always preaching, but somehow the thought of Cas' vessel somehow being the trois to their menage caused hot moisture to pool above her thighs.

He slid the palms of his calloused hands down her backside as he pushed the water logged denim from her waist, watching as she pulled her feet from them. Her hands grasped tightly at his hip bones, causing his breath to hitch and he sucked at his bottom lip as Jane did away with his jeans, leaving them both naked.

Jane stood on her tip toes, pressing her lips to his own for a long overdue kiss, her hands knotting at the back of his neck. She opened her mouth to him, allowing their tongues to mingle before pulling back with a sultry smile. "You first." She said motioning to the quickly filling tub.

Cas bent, turning the water off and eased himself into the decadent water, holding out a hand to help guide her in. "You are sure you-" He was silenced by her pointer finger being pressed to his lips and he grinned, watching her lower herself slowly until she was balanced in his lap. The contact between them was sinful, hips undulating to tease the other and when he'd had enough he slid his hands down to her rear, lifting her from making contact with him.

Jane raised a brow as Cas situated her, pouting at the loss of contact and steadied herself with her hands on his shoulders. "Cas, please?"

His blue eyes met her pleading green ones and after he waited long enough for her to question his intentions he angled his hips, bringing her slowly down on top of him.

Her head fell forwards, their foreheads pressing against each other, eyes locked as Jane slowly took in all of him. It had been almost three years now since she'd gotten laid and the entirety in which Castiel filled her was exquisite.

Cas bit down on his lip as she settled on top of him, sure he'd fucked a lot of women since coming to Camp Chitaqua but so far all of those experiences were paling in comparison. He felt her still, adjusting to the sudden intrusion and placed light kisses across her forehead, his hands leaving the water with a slight splash to rub light circles on the chilled flesh of her back.

"Cas?" Her eyes were closed, as if she was afraid to look him in the eye.

"Yeah." His normally gravelly voice came out at a whisper.

"I love you."

Bringing both of his hands from the water he tangled them in her hair, pulling her head back to expose her neck to his nibbling teeth while grinding as hard as he could against her.

The sensation of his teeth and the friction between them caused a sharp moan to escape her, head falling back as far as he tugged it and her hips rotating slowly in time with his own.

Cas spread his feet out on the porcelain in search of better leverage and upon finding it began thrusting harder into her, their mismatched rhythm causing his toes to curl in pleasure. "Jane." He called, nails digging lightly down her back and mouth moving to take in a hardened nipple.

"Oh, Cas." She replied, her hands moving to grip the porcelain behind him as she tried to keep pace with him. Rocking in more of a circular motion she moaned, his pelvis hitting her clit expertly. "Cas?" Jane tried to get his attention through a moan of pleasure.

Cas looked up at her, "Mmm?" He let her nipple go with an audible smacking of lips, he had wanted to say 'Yes?' but found words difficult through labored breathing.

"I'm," She cut herself off with a cry of pleasure.

He grunted through a moan and nodded, hands wrapping tightly around her hips to bring her down more forcibly onto him, "Me too baby." He felt her walls shake and twitch before they came crashing down upon him, suckling every last ounce of pleasure he had to offer out.

For a while they were quiet, Jane hunched over him with her head resting on his shoulder, Cas running his fingers gently down her back. The only sound was the occasional drip from the faucet and their labored breathing.

"Jane?" He was the first to speak up, looking into her eyes as she pulled away.

"Yeah Cas?"

He lifted a hand, brushing wet locks from her flushed cheeks, "I love you too."


	3. Interior Redecorating

**AN:** Hey guys sorry this update took a little while, but, well, very explicit heterosexual sex/sexual actions including brief oral are depicted in the beginning and majority of this chapter. Also a previous relationship of sexual favors is implied between two male characters if this is not your cup of tea turn back now! You have been warned! And please, leave a review it really really helps =] Thank you for reading!

**Disclaimer:** I am in no way affiliated with the CW network or the creators/writers/producers/cast/crew of the television Supernatural. This is purely a work of fiction originating from my imagination and I do not profit in any way [other than hits/views/possible reviews]

It had been two weeks now since he'd stopped holding his little debauched sessions, much to the chagrin of his regular ladies. Cas was still pushing the drugs he'd managed to come by -narcotics, sleep aids, birth control to name a few- on recent raids, the small crop of marijuana he tended to daily and the occasional eighth of psilocybin mushrooms. However, accepted forms of payments had changed. He wanted to do right by Jane, give this thing between them a real shot. It wasn't like he'd actually had any more to loose at that point by entering the relationship.

Wiping a yawn from his face he took a deep breath, pressing his palms together and raised them up above his head. Closing his eyes he released the breath slowly through his nose; it had been a while since he'd been able to focus long enough to align his chakras, even now he found his mind drifting to Jane. The bouncing mirth of her laughter echoing off the cabin walls, the deep sigh of pleasure and blushing red of her chest that formed after a particularly good orgasm.

Sighing he wrenched his eyes open; as much as he wanted to remain on the image of his girlfriend's naked bottom hovering ever so carefully over him, ready to accept every last inch of him there were things to be done today. Like- A knock at the door interrupted his train of thought and running a hand through his hair quickly he moved to the door.

"Hey." It was a simple one worded greeting, but she'd said more in that short moment than most people had ever said to him.

A smile wrapped itself securely around his features, his upper teeth coming to graze lightly over his bottom lip as the illicit images invaded once again. "Hi." Normally he would have stepped out of the way by now and allowed Jane entrance to the room, but for a few moments he was lost on the shape of her in his doorway.

Licking her lips she raised a brow, taking a step forward and placing herself less than a centimeter away from him. She could smell the heavy scent of marijuana and incense rolling off of him, "So, uh," Jane craned her neck slightly to peer over his shoulder, "can I come in, or?" She let the last syllable hang in the air, watching as his eyes snapped back into focus.

For a moment his mouth hung open as he processed her words, they weren't difficult to understand by any means, but his mind had other things as top priority. "Of course." He stepped aside, pushing the door closed behind her and reached out to her retreating form. Hooking his fingers in the crook of her elbow he pulled her around to face him, using her momentum against her to bring their lips together for a long, lazy kiss.

Cas felt her nails at the back of his neck, her fingers pulling at his hair, and in one swift movement swiveled them both around. Releasing her lower lip he made sure to drag it tortuously between his teeth, opening his eyes to survey the completely smitten look on her face. No doubt a look he was mirroring perfectly. Reaching down without looking to the hem of her tee shirt he pulled up on it, smirking widely as her arms went instinctively up over her head to help in his plight.

Jane flexed her fingers, sending her nails across his scalp and couldn't help biting the inside of her lip as she felt his hips jerk in response. Ever since that day at the lake their relationship had been hot and heavy; neither of them able to deny the need for contact. It was intoxicating the level of completeness she felt with Cas, like if the world was ending right outside the cabin door -as it was likely to these days- it wouldn't matter as long as he was inside of her.

Extending her arms she tossed her shirt in the general direction of the laundry basket and without being prompted began undoing her jeans. Most days Cas took his sweet time exploring, figuring out what made her twitch, but today she was all about getting down to business; she was leaving tomorrow on an expedition as medic, she wouldn't see him for at least a week.

Cas watched as she shimmied out of her jeans and undergarments, brows raising as she dropped to her knees. His breath caught in his throat as her fingertips danced around his waistband, ridding himself of his tee shirt quickly and rand a hand down her jaw. The look in her eye was dark and sultry, she was apparently a woman on a mission and far be it from him to stop a woman determined. He watched her every move, the slow lick of her lips and the gentle arch of her tongue as she moved to take him into her mouth.

His eyes rolled back into his head as he was held securely in her mouth, her tongue darting around in the most pleasurable of ways that were currently making his big toes curl. "Oh Jane." Cas couldn't help the involuntary jerk of his hips as she hummed in agreement around his cock and before he had too much time to savor he felt her release him. Biting the inside of his cheek to keep from protesting at the loss of her well versed lips he offered his hand, guiding her up to stand.

Jane made sure to lick the corners of her lips, sure it had been a quick act of foreplay, but they were working on a limited schedule after all. She couldn't help the dark giggle that escaped her lips as his hands encircled her bottom, lifting her against the cabin door with his pants pooled around his ankles. Cas' elegant length rubbed roughly against her clitoris; once, twice, three times before retreating within her heat.

Cas' head buried into her shoulder as he pressed inside her most sacred place, teeth coming out to nibble across her collar bone as he gave them both a moment to adjust. Jane's hold around his shoulders tightened, her nails digging in at all the right places causing a moan to slip forth. Biting a trail up her neck he reached to her hips bringing her up higher into a better position -which was confirmed by a shuddering gasp from his partner. Covering her lips with his own his palms slid up the sanded wood of the door, hooking over the molding at the top as he began moving his hips slowly.

She was grateful that Cas had started off slow, even though they'd been fucking non stop for the past month and a half she was making a comeback after not getting laid for over three years. Some positions required a little adjusting, as it were. But now was not the time for him to molly coddle her like she couldn't take it. Applying pressure with her palms for leverage she quickened the pace herself until he got the message -which, thankfully didn't take long at all.

Cas could feel the pads of his fingers turn white around the door frame as he slammed Jane into the door with all of his might. She bounced so perfectly between the door and his dick he could almost cry if it weren't for the cramp building in his calf. Wincing slightly he quickly wrapped his hands around her hips, pulling out and guiding her over to his desk. "Bend over." It wasn't even close to a question, his voice slipping into that stony embrace that made her insides quiver.

Jane whimpered loudly at the loss of friction and heat, but as he ordered her into a highly submissive position she could do nothing but "Mmm," in agreement. Leaning her elbows on a pile of papers she made sure to stick her ass out eagerly, waving it slightly as he approached. His short nails skittered up her back, causing it to arch involuntarily as he reentered her from behind. The feel of his hands knotting in her hair was almost too much to take and she bucked against him with all her might.

Cas pulled sharply at the tendrils in his hands, causing her to rear back until her ear was beside his mouth and good God did this angle feel especially velvety and wet. His tongue drew the lobe of her ear into his mouth and he drug his teeth across it, letting it go with a small smack. "You feel so good," He managed to get out in hot puffs of whisper against her ear, the tightening shock waves within beginning at the tip of his phallus. Sliding his free hand across her hip bone he headed into the delicate area of her clitoris, pinching it lightly between his pointer and middle fingers before making a slow circled pattern.

As Cas' fingertips found her proverbial button she reared back onto him desperately, writhing against him in a plea for release. "Cas," She warned with a low near sated moan, her arms snaking up behind her to wind around his neck. Sending her nails down his scalp once more she reached down further to his shoulders, leaving raised, reddened trails of her pleasure.

Cas felt her walls beginning to clench around him and he knew it wouldn't be long before the fireworks went off behind his eyelids, leaving them both moist and twitching on the mattress. Shifting slightly he left her clitoris slowly pressing his two fingers into her. He felt her twist against him slightly before she accepted the extra intrusion, "Do you like that?" From her response he was almost sure she did, but he had to be certain he wasn't causing her any discomfort.

Jane nodded, unable to form proper words at the moment, but the ex Angel wouldn't be satisfied with that, no. That would have been too easy, for he pressed his lips against her ear, his hot breath sinfully tickling in places she more than likely shouldn't find erotic.

"Tell me," He said.

As if it were so easy to just open ones mouth mid mind blowing fuck and speak. "Uh," She hadn't meant to sound like a porno flick, "Uh," but here she was, "Uh!" Taking a deep breath she finally was able to speak, her voice loud and pleading with a feral need he had never witnessed before, "Fuck me Castiel."

That was all the encouragement he needed, fuck, the use of his full name was nearly enough to send him over the edge in itself -funny, now that he was human the _things_ he could find erotic. He curled his middle finger slightly inside of her right on top of her g-spot, pumping himself as fast as he could in and out of her, doing his best to bring her to a shaking, whimpering mess. Removing his hand from her hair he reached forward to the desk, completely changing the angle of penetration and eliciting a few more porno flick worthy notes from his lover.

Eying the object in mind he grasped it firmly in his hand -a hemp necklace with hand carved beads he had made for her- and slipped it around her neck. He hadn't had the time to size it earlier and now he held both ends in his hand, applying just enough pressure to pull her back into their previous upright position. The way she squirmed furiously against him, legs shaking violently against his own, he knew she liked it -perhaps a bit more than he thought she would. Cas found few of his previous partners delighted in toying with slight controlled sexual asphyxiation, but he found it to be a huge turn on.

Jane couldn't believe the sensations running from her cunt to the rest of her body, it was like little webs of electricity spider webbing out to fuck the shit out of every erogenous zone on her body. Never before had she thought she would find pleasure in having her airway restricted, but she trusted Cas and this may have been the best fucking thing he had ever introduced to her. She hadn't got a good look at the necklace he was using, but she was positive it would be part of their routine from now on.

Cas could feel himself reaching the peak of his performance for this round and removed his fingers from inside of her, moving quickly to place his hand at the base of her neck and released on the necklace he had been using, fingers digging roughly into her hair once again. Cas used the grip he had at her collarbone to bring her back to meet him exquisitely in time, the sound of rough dire sex filling the cabin. "I love you, Jane." He spoke lowly once more against the angle of her jaw and he felt her clench impossibly tight around him. With a few last mismatched thrusts he felt the swirling heat come together at his midsection, pooling out of his twitching member buried deep inside of her. Resting his forehead against her sweated shoulder he placed gentle breathless kisses on her back.

Jane breathed heavily through the last waves of orgasm, "I love you too, Cas. Oh God," She ran a hand through her hair, legs shaking relentlessly her arms fell, hands splaying out on the desk to steady herself. She felt Cas pull away from her slightly, the residue of their fevered coupling spilling forth with the removal of his prick. "That was amazing," His hands moved, coming to dangle in front of her, the necklace from moments ago dangling from his palms.

"I know it's not much," He said, still winded from their vigorous activities, "but I made it myself." He brought it back to her neck, putting a temporary knot in it before his arms encircled her waist. "The beads took a long time." Cas wasn't complaining about the work put in to it, merely stating facts, but Jane understood that -understood him really, which was such a hard thing to come by. Glancing over his shoulder he spotted the chair a step or two back and releasing her from his grip sat in it, his hand falling to absently stroke himself. He couldn't help his excitement, she was, after all still very naked on his desk, the day before she was supposed to depart.

Jane opened her mouth to say something but was cut short by something hitting the ground. Glancing in the direction the noise came from she giggled realizing it was the molding from the top of the door. She heard Cas' bark of laughter from behind her and she turned to face him, brow raising mischievously.

At the look on her face his head fell slightly to the side, "What?"

Jane closed the distance between them, smirking at the fact that he was already prepared for round two. Her answer was silent as she took him in her hand, guiding him back home.

–

Cas lay stretched out in bed, stroking the soft hair of his companion, Jane. He must have over self medicated at some point because he couldn't remember how they got here, tangled up in the sheets breathing each other in. He closed his eyes for a moment, taking a break from counting her freckles and the water spots on the ceiling. Taking a deep breath the air inside the cabin seemed to shift, a slight sizzle to the air like when putting a match out with water. As if everything around him had vanished all at once in the quickest, quietest fire ever. The smell of stinking sulfur invaded his nostrils and his eyes flew open.

To nothing. Serene, haunting blackness. His arms flailed out, everything and nothing seemed to be screaming at him all at once, noises from unseen objects whizzing by as he began to fall. He tried to turn his head to check on Jane but he couldn't move, his fingers grasped wildly for a warm body that wasn't there.

Cas had no idea what was going on but everything was so loud, like an auditorium full of instruments blaring at once. Silver tipped black feathers whizzed by him in the updraft of darkness and the noises started to come together into a solid percussive beat. Once, twice, three times before he started awake, chest heaving and hands grasping at the shirt across his chest.

Wincing slightly it took a moment to take in his surroundings in the dark, one thing was for sure he was home in 2016 and someone was knocking impatiently at his door. _"Hey Cas! Open up in there! We need to talk!"_ That was Dean's voice for sure but there was a certain note to it that was off, as if he were somehow yelling less irritatedly.

"Yeah, coming!" Pushing himself from the comfort of his bed he shuffled across the floor, hands not even bothering to adjust clothes or hair as he struggled to light the kerosene lamp. The first match, of course, was damp. But the second match did it's job and he found the room blurring into view. Moving to the door he heaved a sigh before undoing the chain, bolt and lock. Cas opened the door and retreated back to the warmth of his bed. "What can I do for you Dean?"

Dean's eyes traveled the room slowly as if he were afraid to gaze upon the room's only occupant. "Cas, uh," He fumbled for a moment, pulling the door closed behind him. It stunk like marijuana in here, had the ex Angel ever managed to stay sober? Not that he was any better with the drinking and being addicted to sex. "Are you high?"

Cas raised a brow, Dean had barged into his cabin late at night for a variety of reasons, but he failed to see what his state of sobriety had to do with anything. Especially at this hour. "Why, what is it that you require?" It was no secret that he and Dean hadn't been on the best of terms for the past couple of years -even though at this point who knew what they were mad at each other for anymore anyway- and Cas made no illusion as to what Dean being in his cabin usually meant. He wanted something -drugs, booze, perhaps the illicit sexual favor between friends; Cas didn't look down his nose at favors between those of the same sex, but the favors he and Dean shared were always top secret, few and far between. His head fell slightly to the side in confusion, brow furrowing slightly -it was a look Dean knew all to well. "Why are you back so early?"

"I, uh," He adjusted his voice in an effort to stall for time, "I've got some bad news." Dean ran a hand over the stubble on his cheek, "Ran into a horde of Croats," He shook his head, hands wringing together, "they're getting smarter, disabled one of the vans."

A look of fear flashed in Castiel's eyes and without words he begged Dean to just spit it out, get it over with.

"We fought so hard to-" Dean cut himself short, he had gotten over explaining things to people a long time ago. The Apocalypse was never over and there just wasn't enough frigging time. "Jane," The sharp blues of Cas' eyes trembled and Dean swallowed hard over the lump in his throat, "she didn't make it."

"What?" His nose twitched slightly and his eyes began to burn, he'd heard Dean perfectly fine but he needed more information than this. "What do you mean she didn't make it?" Cas knew very well what the camp's leader meant but he needed to hear it again.

"She got bit before I could get to her." Dean watched Cas' face crumble and contort, his shoulders slinking in defeat. Sure their friendship had seen better times but it still hurt immensely to watch the fallen Angel have to experience something like this for the first time. "I swear I turned around as fast as I could, did everything within my God damn power to get everyone out alive but-" His jaw clenched, the long scar across his cheek tightening and stuffed the grief back down, "I'm sorry Cas."

His expression cracked with waves of quivering emotion and with great effort he bit back his sorrow momentarily, "Did you shoot her?" The normally strong voice came out soft and meager.

"Yes." Dean kept quiet, the only sound in the cabin the anguish of someone he at one time considered his brother. Rubbing his palms together he watched as Cas folded in on himself and slowly he made his way to the bed. He sat at the edge stiffly, the mattress vibrating with the whimpering sobs of Castiel the former Angel of Thursday. "Cas." He reached over, pulling his comrade into a strong hug, "It's gonna be okay."

His eyes stung, his head pounded and his chest ached. Every fiber of his being screamed for Jane, but as Dean pulled him into a hug he decided the much burlier, musky scented male would have to do. Castiel lacked the will to hold himself up and he collapsed against Dean, "Please don't go."

Those three words took him back to a few years ago when he'd been the one to utter them in a pleading, needy tone to Cas. Lucifer was wearing Sammy to prom and he'd needed someone to help him cope. Their fling hadn't lasted long, though, despite how much he cared for the Angel and occasionally craved him, a relationship was just not in the cards for them. Mostly because they were after the same thing; instant pleasure. The thrill of flesh, the peak of adrenaline, the pinnacle of violence. No matter how you put it, love hadn't been something they looked for in each other and it likely would never be. Comfort, however, was an entirely different thing.

"Alright, Cas." Dean kicked his boots off as Cas lay on the opposite side of the bed and tossed his jacket carelessly on the floor. Pulling down a corner of the blankets he slipped between them, cradling himself around Castiel. Hesitantly he slipped an arm around him and shut his eyes as Cas shook with grief. "Everything will be alright Cas, you'll see."


	4. Mary, Mary

**AN:** Hey guys! Sorry for the wait, I just needed to find time to drabble and such. I am not sure how I feel about this chapter, but meh. Just go with it, things will make sense at some point later eventually =]. please leave a review if you can!

Cas wasn't sure what day it was, but it didn't matter -here behind the wheel, the engine roaring and the chassis bucking he could almost forget everything. The scenery was awash in orange, that time between dusk and nightfall that seems to magnify the intensity of the setting sun. Stray beams cascaded over the dashboard as the canopy of trees whizzed by, shadow struggling against light in an ageless battle.

His foot pressed against the accelerator a little harder, coaxing the old Ranger into a sputtering eighty five miles per hour -the truck needed work, but Cas couldn't find it in himself to care. With Jane gone now -how long had it been? Squinting into the setting sun he hunched over the steering wheel, elbows propped to guide the wheel as he fumbled with a joint and zippo. Inhaling sharply he tossed the zippo into the cup holder, a bottle of pills rattling in protest, and decided it had been roughly two months now. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered anymore.

The joint burned hot and quick, before he knew it he could feel the sting of embers at his fingertips and he cursed loudly, flicking the roach out of the drivers side window. Returning his attention back to the road he squinted against the shadow of a house looming in the distance, the sunlight seemed angry, swallowing the image up, burning into his eyes and obstructing his view. As the road curved and everything came back into focus he could do nothing but curse -a large deer, one he could picture over a boastful hunters fireplace, was crossing the road. And, despite the way the truck barreled down the road, gripping tightly to the asphalt, the animal didn't seem at all in a hurry.

Slamming both feet onto the brakes he held on to the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles yellowing around the edges as he braced himself. The truck slowed slightly before he tried to correct around the deer, the back wheels screeching as he inevitably lost control. As everything upended itself, spinning and frightening, Cas could tell the rear of the truck clipped the animal. His hands flew from the wheel to above his head, the horrible crunch of metal against pavement consuming all other manner of sound.

Time seemed to slow here, in these moments of chaos. As the truck righted itself Cas slammed down from the roof into the passenger seat, able to make sense enough of his surroundings to see a line of trees. Before he had time to react metal screamed against bark and he felt himself become weightless again, reminded of the stratosphere and stink of ozone.

–

Everything was fuzzy, like looking through murky water. Colors diluted themselves, mending into one blaringly elegant mess. He blinked once, twice before everything began to come together. The fuzz had spread to his ears and they began to ring loudly, almost deafening. A voice sounded, garbled and watery as if it were coming through the ether.

"I wouldn't move too much if I were you." This time it was clearer, his eyes falling to the speaker.

He passed an eye over the room, a pointer coming to massage at the opening of his ear. "Where am I?"

A chair creaked, the stranger rising up and coming closer to the bedside. "Bloomsburg, Pennsylvania."

Cas squinted slightly, his vision seemed to come back all at once and he looked to the female at his bedside. She seemed nice enough, a kind rounded face and a voice that was much more southern than Pennsylvania.

"You've been here almost three weeks."

His brows knotted together, "Three weeks," He repeated numbly, "How did I get here?"

Her face became serious, both brows raised in shocked surprise. "You mean you don't remember?"

Cas shook his head in the negative, hands folding over the blanket across his lap.

This seemed to worry her and she chewed lightly on her bottom lip, dragging it between her teeth nervously. "I found you in the road." The words seemed to come out in a rush, as if she wasn't sure if she should even be saying them, "You had an accident," Looking at the foot of the bed she seemed to debate seating herself and settled for gesturing with a nod of the head. "Do you mind?"

Cas nodded his permission, pushing himself higher up on the bed. "It must have been pretty bad."

"Your truck was bent up around some trees," Carefully, almost weightlessly, she sat on the corner of the bed, "Found you a few feet away in the woods. You're lucky." Her eyes searched his face, as if he was missing something, as if he were supposed to be seeing something more to the situation. "Whats your name?"

He opened his mouth to respond, but found himself needing a moment to decide. His thoughts seemed to swim, snippets coming together out of sync and he shook his head, eyes closing.

"Oh," Her voice was small, apologetic. "I went back, after I was sure you'd be alright-" She cut herself off, standing, "Found a few things that might help." Moving to the closet she opened the door, disappearing behind it for a moment.

Cas could feel the sting of frustration, his eyes slicking with the humiliation of the situation.

He voice was muffled, coming from the inside of the closet. "I didn't look through any of it, figured-" The door slammed shut, "When you woke up you'd want it to be how you left it."

He watched her, dragging a large duffel across the floor by it's straps. "Thank you." The words felt alien to him, as if he hadn't spent enough time using them.

"It was getting dark," She huffed a little, dragging the bag to the bedside, "Didn't see no sense in leaving you to the zombies."

His eyes slammed shut at that, flashes of memory coming in and out like the tide. "Cas." It was almost whispered and he could hear her lean a bit closer.

"What?"

"Cas. My name is Cas." It sounded right, seemed right. Something nagged at him, "At least I think so."

A warm smile overtook her and in that moment he admired her, it fit her well. "Well, Cas, it's nice to meet you. My name is Mary."

It sparked something in him, her name. As if there was something huge he wasn't realizing, like there was something looming in the distance, a vast dam holding back life changing information. But he couldn't break through, no matter how much he wanted to. At the very least he had a name. "Hello Mary." He tried to force a smile, tried to say thanks within the simple gesture, but it didn't reach his eyes and it did nothing to quell the pit growing in his stomach. "Zombies?!"

–

"Cas?"

A warm voice echoed up the stairwell. "Yes?" Setting the paint brush onto the tray he wiped at his hands with a rag from his back pocket.

"Lunch!"

He smirked, "Just a minute!" Taking a step back he crossed his arms over his chest, admiring his work. Not bad for an amnesiac's first time painting. The walls to the spare room looked glossy, shimmering underneath the fresh coat of white.

It was odd, the way life seemed to fall into place after he had woken up here. Mary needed things done around the house and he was feeling better every day -not quite enough to test his skills beyond the safety of the house against the looming infected, but enough to at least feel like he was repaying her for letting him stay, It wasn't as if he had anywhere to go -as least, that was, anywhere he knew of.

The creak on the fifth step seemed natural as he headed downstairs and he realized how strange it was to become so familiar with a home. Had he been a drifter before the accident? Roaming across the lands, never becoming too comfortable or to familiar with one place?

"You best quit dilly dallying! It's gonna get cold!"

"I doubt it." Cas smirked over her shoulder, catching her off guard as she dropped the spatula into the frying pan.

"How may times I gotta tell you not to do that?!" Her hand clutched at her chest, the other knotted in a dishtowel at her side.

"Yes ma'am." He grinned from ear to ear, chuckling lightly, patting a hand on her shoulder. Going to the table he sat, waiting for her to join him -it was nice the way everything was starting to become routine. How long had he been here anyways?

"Good Lord, let us give thanks..."

Her voice seemed to fall away as she asked the blessing, had it already been a month since he woke up in the spare room?

"..and beg for Christ's sake, Amen."

"Amen." His attention was pulled back to his lunchtime company, "Thank you, Mary." Cas made it a habit of thanking her for meals and everyday she gave him a reason as to why he didn't need too.

"Oh hush, hard working men need their fuel."

He nodded in agreement, after lunch while the paint dried he had to do a perimeter check -not that anything was coming through _that_ fence, it just made him feel secure.

–

"Mary!" His voice echoed across the field to her silhouette cast upon a hanging sheet, a slight timbre to his voice suggesting that something could possibly be very wrong. He moved quickly towards her.

She stepped out from behind the row of clothes on the line, clothespins tucked into her apron. "Yeah, Cas?" Her voice was worried, he'd never sounded distressed about their barriers before.

"Hi!" He smirked, waving and then chuckled as he got closer, a balled up pair of briefs hitting his chest. Catching them he came to a stop in front of her.

"Cas you ass!" Her cheeks flustered slightly, "I thought something might have been really wrong, don't do _that_!"

He chuckled once more, bending to grab a handful of clothespins from the laundry basket. "Yes ma'am." Moving to the next line he began hanging a row of towels, stealing glimpses where he could.

–


End file.
